elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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