so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
