Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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