why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize