my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
