tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
