Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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