But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
