sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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