do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize