Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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