who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
