brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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