i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize