she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
My vagina just recognized that song.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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