So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
