physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize
