First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
