Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
