we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
You made out with two different species that night
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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