try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
