Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
