But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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