You're completely useless in the revolution.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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