no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
