Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
