Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
