just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Randomize
