Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
