Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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