Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Come back. Shots need mouths.
i believe in u and ur pee
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
