I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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