Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
