Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
