Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
