He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
