Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
