this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
she smelled like a LAN party
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
