Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
