I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
