She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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