We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I am spending my child support on dildos
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
