Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
as a side note pls kill me
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
