id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
