Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
