last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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