I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
