do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
