I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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