you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize