You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
